Homemade lip, face, body (and possibly nipple) scrub.

I have done it again.  And I am a genius.
Or maybe just really hungry today...


Either way,  I have created a beauty-making masterpiece in my kitchen, and because I love you, I am sharing with you my super secret recipe for gorgeous skin.  And probably a fat ass, if you're like me.  Since I can't stop eating it.
Not so much eating it, but "testing" it, as a lip scrub.  A lot.  And sometimes I miss my lips completely, and accidentally just scoop it into my mouth.  Don't judge me.

Sticky, scrubby, moisturizing sugary goodness.

So.  The business.

You need:

Turbinado sugar.  The big brown scrubby stuff.  For scrubbing.  About a cup, I think.  But you know how I am at measuring important stuff.

Coconut oil.  Preferably organic.  Because I'm a snob.  Enough to make all the sugar wet.  (Insert dirty joke, here.)

Honey.  About a tablespoon.  Preferably local, not because I'm a snob, but because don't be a jerk.  Support your local folks.


So, you mix all that goodness together in a a jar until it's all mingled and looks like dessert.
Then taste it.  Five or six times.  Because this concoction is so natural and delightful, that you can eat the whole thing, and not have to worry about toxins or artificial bullshit that isn't good for your body.
I don't recommend doing that, however.  Diabetes isn't cool, and you'll probably throw up.

I made this intending upon using it as a lip scrub, but it would work just as well as a facial scrub, a body scrub, or as one of my questionably weird friends suggested, "a nipple scrub."
I don't typically scrub my nipples, but that's just a personal choice I've made for myself.  Your nipples and your exfoliation habits are your own.

I plan on taking my magic nipple scrub into the shower with me later, and using it to beautify all my bits, and maybe as a light snack while I'm there.
If you try it, let me know how it worked for you.  Or how it tasted on your ice cream.